Hi everyone,
Just a bit of background:
I wrote this piece because I was asked to perform a piece for A Breast Cancer Survivors Ball. I was very shocked at this invitation and deeply touched because I have never been through this or been around anyone closely enough to even share personal experiences, but was trusted for such an offering. I wouldn’t be able to make it so I recorded this piece and decided to share it on my site and soundcloud. The event (Pretty In Pink) was held by Gardner’s House which is an organization that helps people with Cancer to get necessities and support that they need despite circumstances. The founder is a breast cancer survivor herself. I find her story very inspiring. She is a beautiful person and full of strength. As I explored more and more stories on breast cancer survivors and their families, this is what came to me. Find out more about the dynamic and excellent work of Gardners House here: http://www.gardnershouse.org
Beautiful
They said I would not make it to see today
This morning I opened my eyes
Breathed the breath of life
And knew that there was a reason why
I give thanks
I cannot stop
I have to try
There is a reason why
When adversity comes we must learn how to ascend
We must teach ourselves to fly
Pink is symbolic of my struggle
of my climb
of how far we have come
and that we can still have fun
It keeps me inspired to do more because there is more to come
It reminds me I have and must continue to do more than just survive
To enhance the quality of life
To be beautiful and bold enough to take the masked faces off of our fears
Embrace the tears from many nights of remembrance and dealing
The days to this point have not been easy
Many nights I cried myself to sleep
Heaving oxygen wondering why all of this now?
To me?
Cancer did not make me who I am, but on this journey I refused to let it break me
The reality hit when they said I have numbered days to live
That was the hardest part of the day but in acceptance of what may come I found truth
Death begins in the mind and I have more work to do
Sometimes the ugliest things in life show us the true beauty within
It breaks us down to show us what created the bonds in our foundation
It took me so long to see
I had been blind
Keeping up with appearances and holding onto unnecessary things
They say beauty is in the eyes of the beholder but what does that mean when your eyes are not seeing reality
If there is no room to see what can be
They said I would not make it to see today
This morning I opened my eyes
Breathed the breath of life
And knew that there was a reason why
Every night I will shine with the stars
Shine the light on visions of sunrise
Every day I will rise with the sun
Warm and brilliant
Blossoming as the flowers do
Growing through adversity
Triumphant
Spreading my wings and soaring like the birds do
Coming out of my cocoon
I am no longer in hiding or ashamed
Or to be pitied
I am a reflection of possibility
A beauty
In rare form
No longer feeling like a victim
I am a victorious woman
And I still dream
Finding blessings in each piece of every day
A kind word
A loving hug
A smile so warm
The calm of the rain
The force of the storm
The rainbow after
Fall came around and my hair was falling as much as the green from the trees
Preparing for the coldest winter
Waiting for the warmth of spring
Every day in the interactions and encounters
Discouraging appointments filled with sympathy
I am more than a body
No empathy
Sorry ma’am We can’t do anything
But I must do everything
And through all of this they say you’re so beautiful
Through the daily tears
Through the hair that went from blowing to gone with the wind
Beautiful
No more breasts that aspired to make me voluptuous
Beautiful
Dress clothes free
A minor touch of make-up
Beautiful
That is what they’d call me
So I asked my boyfriend one day when everything sent to me seemed to be crumbling or washed away by the tide
Why everyone thought I was so beautiful now
He almost instinctively said that it was the determination to live
The passion to experience the ability to breathe once more
The fight to get better and become stronger every day
The optimism when the world tries to take it away and show you every reason to complain
Influencing you to give up
Redefining the conditioning we have received about beauty
Because it is something that grows within you and radiates
You are an inspiration reminding us to never give up
Emphasizing that the quality of life is one of the most valuable things in life
That it isn’t what happens to you that creates you
It is what you choose to become
They said I would not make it to see today
This morning I opened my eyes
Breathed the breath of life
And knew that there was a reason why
To be all that I can be
My full self
To not only be pretty in pink but to embrace my beauty
Our beauty
To express the spectrum inside of me
Copyright© 2013 Narelle Thomas
All rights reserved.
Narelle Thomas: Words and Feelings 